Less baby, more paycheck means…mixed emotions

Jul. 11th, 2017

My last day of maternity leave is met with mixed emotions. Well, to be real, are they really mixed? Maybe.

I did a trial daycare run with Magoo this week so that if being away from him for the first time was really difficult I wouldn’t be in the middle of a meeting crying in the corner. It’s been an overall okay experience. And one to test my micromanagement tendencies. I have given the daycare lots of feedback on a variety of things. “Please don’t put him in baby vegas”. I’ll dedicate another post to some of the crazy things for babies. I say “crazy” without judgement 🙂

I did debate staying home and quitting my job. Like, for reals. The camera man and I had a sit down heart-to-heart. And, after much soul searching (and I admit, maj tears), I decided that working (at least part-time) was the right decision for me. For now. Much like daycare, I’m giving work a trial run. If I can’t stomach leaving his sweet face four days a week, then adios corporate world, and hello to those stinky diapers that I actually love! Who. am. I.?

I don’t want to get political, that’s not what this blog is about, but I will say this. I had five months at home with my child. Five. Way more than many mommas out there have. And when I sat down with HR to discuss my leave beforehand I asked, “Will I get bored? Do people come back early? Five months out is a long time.” Hahaha. Turns out, I didn’t get bored. I did go crazy, didn’t sleep, felt overwhelmed and in over my head, but never bored. And despite the madness and that life is waaay more challenging as a Stay at Home Mom than it is as a corporate cog, I loved every single second. And I wish all moms who want it could have that sweet time with their babes. Handing him over at five months felt almost criminal to me. He can’t even crawl yet and I’m letting someone else care for him? Am I giving someone else my child to raise? Is this why I had him – only to hand him over to some stranger who will teach him the secrets of life without me? These are the guilt-ridden thoughts swirling through my mind as I type.

He’s in daycare right now and I am enjoying my last day – had a TREAT YOSELF day (e.g., spa, books, real housewives) – but I am dying to go pick him up early. As I write this, tears are welling up. I miss him. It’s been eight hours and I feel like I desperately need to see him and smell him. I don’t know what it is about his smell, but it sends me over the moon. 

Again. Who. Am. I.? I guess officially a Mom. 

This weekend…

Jun. 2nd, 2017

I am working on a collaboration that I can’t wait to share with you all. There are some incredibly talented people out there and I’m so excited to get this collab party started!

And, I also get to look at this. Spring is still here and it’s heaven…

Le bebe gets showered

May. 26th, 2017

My mom threw me the most amazing baby shower; it’s crowning jewel was a “Momosa bar”. She hosted at her house in Northern California, but I have such amazing people in my life that LA friends and family flew up for the day! I (and my baby) are pretty lucky.

For those throwing a baby shower the things I most appreciated (people excluded since they are obviously #1) included:

The cheekiest “bar” I’ve ever seen.

Bite-sized everything. From fruit kabobs to mini sandwiches wrapped in green onions, no one left hungry. 

Games, games, and more games. My idea of a party is people coming together as a group and having a bit of a giggle fest. Mission accomplished with my Mom’s version of Price is Right and the Name Game. 

A party isn’t complete without a theme. My mom used soft blues, whites, with pops of yellow. As well as Mom and baby elephants! I lurv everything with animals, so that theme won my heart.

And if that wasn’t enough, my grad school girlfriends in LA threw me a surprise baby shower when we did a ladies trip to Lake Arrowhead!

Baby celebrating is fun, guys. 

California Wall

May. 23rd, 2017

When the camera man and I packed up our bags and left California for the East Coast I was incredibly excited to see what a season really is (translation: lots of effing snow), but at the same time was pretty bummed out about having to leave my friends and family. The people I love are everything to me. I wanted to pack them up and take them with me. Short of being able to uproot all these people and install them in a little house down the street, I took a little souvenir from each of them and created a California “art” wall in my new home.

At a going away bbq, amidst the eating and libations, we put together a painting station where friends could create anything their little hearts desired. I discovered that I have some talented friends! People really got into it! And now when I look at my California wall and see my friends’ individual paintings I get to remember sixteen little pieces of California.  Also, the nugget looooooves staring at it.

Please note: Red solo cups. Keeping it classy.

Process to hang – I traced one of the canvases on top of a grocery bag and cut 16 squares based on this shape. I didn’t do any measuring when hanging, just eyeballed it to get an idea of where I wanted the display in my home. The level and ruler were busted out in the hanging stage.

And just cause I love them so much – all my painters!

A gift for my labor team

May. 11th, 2017

Yes, I am an overplanner. Yes, I do love to DIY. And yes, I did do this before I went to the hospital. In fact, I made these before I packed my hospital bag. Because they are adorable and why not?

I think it’s a sweet gesture to thank those who help you through your labor and your post-partum stay. And now that I’ve been through it and constantly rave about my hospital experience, the staff deserves this and more! Seriously. The nurses, midwives and doctors were angels sent by the universe to help me push a human through a tiny orifice. Too much? I know.

Cutting to the point. I made these with old leftover cardboard boxes. I cut them down to be a height where snacks could sit upright, covered them in wrapping paper, and made signs so we could put them in the breakroom and the staff could forage as they pleased. We received so many thank yous and helped satiate some rumbling 4am stomachs in the OB ward. So I encourage you preggo ladies, if you do have some time to throw something like this together, it really does feel worth it. These people become such a huge part of your life for three days. It feels pretty good to make them smile. Plus, don’t you want someone to like you who is going to be all up in your business? Just saying.  

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